Nice to see you!

Three major events occurred for me last year (2010), all in the space of about 2 weeks. I turned 50. The following day I got married. Two weeks later, my oldest daughter became pregnant with her first child and my first grandchild.

Most middle-aged people will tell you that in their minds, they still feel 20 something. It's the same for me.

Wasn't it only yesterday that I was planning a night out with guys from the surf club? That gorgeous new perm. Flaired, cuffed denims and the red t-shirt with the off-the-shoulder frill. Corked platform wedgies. **sigh**

Suddenly I'm looking in the mirror and wondering how 30 years can flash by so damned quickly!

So here I am in cyberspace, sharing my genuine shock and horror with anyone who'll listen and maybe I'll even meet some other over 50s who find themselves in the same predicament!

Welcome to my dilemna!!

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Allow me to expose myself

My little brother writes a blog.  He is still doing it tough after losing his soul mate in October last year, to a brain tumour.  He writes very honestly and from the heart.

He began his new blog with the title 'Allow me to expose myself' and he gave lots of interesting facts about himself, which also included some sad and scary stuff from his past.  I knew most of it, but I thought it was an interesting beginning to his life journal.

So I thought about 'exposing' myself here.  I've thought about it a lot.

I can't expose myself as honestly as my brother does.

Taking into consideration the people who I know read this blog regularly, there is stuff that I couldn't or wouldn't share with them.  Not because I don't trust them with the information, but because some of it would be upsetting for them (and I don't just mean you Grannymus), and then I would be worried about how they were feeling.  I don't want the worry.

So I can share 'some' stuff ... but not 'all' of the stuff.

  • I am short.  155cm or 5' 2" in the old scale.
  • I was sexually abused as a child.  The first time, I was aged 8.
  • I went to 17 different schools while travelling around Australia in a caravan with my parents.
  • I was a competitive swimmer and was fast enough to enter the Australian Championships, but my interest in boys took precedence.
  • I have struggled with fluctuating weight all of my life.
  • I was the oldest child in my family.
  • I have no tattoos.
  • I have never had a driver's licence (I had my 'L's at age 27 but it expired)
  • I have been married twice, with a 12 year relationship in between.
  • I have given birth to four children, had two miscarriages and one termination.  
  • My first baby died of SIDS at 16 wks of age.
  • I love photography.
  • I like frogs (a lot).
  • I'm a good listener.
  • I worked for the CES and Centrelink combined for 16 years (and loved it).
  • Even though I wasn't diagnosed until I was 45 yrs of age, I believe that I have suffered from depression my whole life.
  • I don't trust Doctors.
  • By the age of 45, I had lost both of my parents.
  • Apart from the odd marijuana joint (maybe 6 in my life),  I have never used recreational drugs (unless you count tobacco or alcohol).
  • I'm a lounge lizard sports junkie.
  • I met my Adoring Husband in a free 'over 40s' internet chat room.
  • I hate camping.
  • I hate talking on the phone.
  • I hate celery.
  • I hate housework.
  • I love being a grandmother.
  • I love Spring.
  • I love rivers and oceans and clouds and trees and nature's happy energy.
  • I love my life.
So there's some 'stuff'.  Stuff you may or may not have known about me.  Some heavy stuff, but mostly light stuff.

I have been quite distracted tonight and am thinking that I probably should have left this particular post for another day when I could focus properly on it, however, what's done is done now.

So perhaps it's been more of a sneak peek than actually exposing myself.

Maybe another time.

Nite all.

3 comments:

❦❧Judi❦❧ said...

I love getting to know you Roz. Thanks for posting this little (and Huge) insight into yourself. Take care.

Anonymous said...

I must admit I was holding my breath until you made me smile with
your message to me. What you haven't said is that you are and
ALWAYS HAVE BEEN a great and lovely
person - I grieve over all your
pain and would take it if I could. You are loved by many of us.
grannymus xx

eljaih said...

You say that peoples memories make the person who they are, and I am who I am because YOU were always there for me, you loved me even when you hated me, you trusted (most) of my judgments, and you are the best mother anyone could ever ask for.
I LOVE YOU!